Angels

It has been a rough week for some people close to me. And myself.

One of my closest friends from college lost her little boy last week. He only lived about a week. I had the honor of meeting the sweet little guy in the NICU before his mom and dad took him home. The funeral is today. Pretty sure I'll have a big red swollen nose before the day is over.

My patient died over the weekend. Was is expected? Yes. Did that make it any easier? No. The family loved their day shift nurse (they went way back), so she stayed as well until the little girl passed. In my five years of working at this childrens hospital I have never seen a child earn their angel wings while I was in the room. The reality of the things we had just witnessed and done for this child didn't hit me until I got in the car to go home (they usually send you home if a child dies on your shift). I bawled my eyes out the entire ride home. Then woke Rog up when I got home and he let me cry it out a bit longer.

Today I'm more at peace with all of the situations life has dealt these families; though, I could still cry at any moment if you caught me unprepared.

But this week has stressed how grateful I am for the gospel in my life. Life isn't fair sometimes. We all know this. My heart aches for my friends who are dealing with rough trials. I wish I could bring each of them some chocolate and let them rant and rave and cry. But I can't begin to describe how lucky I felt in each of these situations that I believed in heaven. And eternal families.

My patient's sister was being brought into the room so she could be there when her sister passed away. Her uncle was talking to her, I was behind them listening. He said "Do you remember what we told you? That '.......' will go to heaven tonight to be with Jesus?" This sweet little girl responded in tears "yes, she will be an angel".

I cried then and there listening to that sweet conversation. It was an honor and a privilege to be there to witness this innocent little girl earn her ticket to heaven that night. And I'm so very grateful for the Angels that watch over us and our loved ones during these rough times.

Sleep Training

Sitting up......done. (Within 5 days of the therapist coming over.)

Rolling over......done. Mostly.

Eating solids.....yep. Loving it.

Sleeping through the night.....nope.

Able to get herself to sleep without needing to be rocked, cuddled, bounced, paced, etc....big nope.

With that being said, we are sleep training as of today. And ya know what? It's awful! You know those fun size packages of Reese's Fastbreaks they sell for $1? Ate half a bag waiting for her to stop screaming. Awesome.

How do you all do it?!

We're doing the screaming interval method for now. Scream for 5, held for 2 - and repeat. It's taken three rounds of this with each nap today. She cried hard. Splotchy face and all. I cried too. Probably will again when we have to do this cycle again with the next nap.

Definitely not tackling sleeping through the night yet. I don't have nerves of steel. I can only handle so much this week. Maybe next week.

She's just too big to be bounced to sleep forever. And we can't leave her with anyone except my mom. Babysitters can't handle a tough sleeper, I won't do that to them. We can't have more babies if we're pacing the halls with a two year old. (No, we are not even thinking about thinking about thinking of having another one yet.)

Will someone come hold my hand while she screams please? I'm such a softy. I thought I'd be good at this! I can get the toughest of heart babies to sleep at work. Why can't I get my own child to sleep normally?!

What we don't do out of desperation for some sleep and time to get things done around the house...........

Love Day

Happy Valentine's Day

2011

Valentine's Day is kind of a big deal to me. Not because of the flowers, the cards, the chocolate, the excuse to go out to eat. It's because four Valentine's ago Roger and I decided we were only dating each other. Rog brought it up while we ate at the Roof downtown...not that he was planning on it. It just came up. Three months later that led to the big marriage discussion. Four month later we were married.

So its an important day to me.

This year we included an extra Valentine on the 'love' list. She joined us for dinner at Asian Star. Next year we'll leave her at home - she was so hyper! Who fed her sugar? But she sure was a hit - we got stopped all night!

She's figuring out how to pull her bows off. Darn. We really need her to grow some hair so she'll look like a girl once I can no longer keep the bows on her.

Now for the cheesy stuff. No eye rolling...all of you go write your own posts about the loves in your life so I can have something to read.

It's amazing to me how such a simple thing - a wedding ring - signifies so much!

Four years later that commitment means so much more. How lucky that my future is tied to Roger. Our life isn't perfect, neither is our marriage. Thank goodness. Life would be pretty boring if we didn't have an excuse to fight and then make up! :)

Roger is just so good to me, even when I don't deserve it. He's such a good dad as well. He was nervous to take on that title, afraid of the responsibility it would be. Yet, most days he's better at being a spouse and a parent than I am!

I love both of the Valentines in my life. Who couldn't love them when they are both so dang cute?!

Happy Love Day!