Monday, January 2, 2012

Beau Scott Bland


This adorable baby has stolen our hearts. I find myself constantly thinking about him. I call Meg everyday, multiple times, to check in on him. I can't get enough of just looking at him. What a miracle.


Roger and I met this angel the day after his birth. I thought I was prepared to hold it together. After all, he came out huge compared to Brooklyn. And was doing so so so well! I walked into his little corner room, barely even registering anything else around me. Meg's first words to me in that moment were "he's big huh?". I instantly started to cry. Because, NO, HE'S NOT BIG. He's just tiny. I have no clue where he's hiding that extra poundage, but he is just so little.


I was stunned at how strongly my emotions took over that day. I worry, constantly. I love this little man. Because he's my twin sister's baby! And my nephew.


I am as protective of him as I was of Brooklyn. I watch his NICU nurses and pray they are as kind, gentle and sweet with him as our NICU nurses were. Truly, they will make or break this experience for Meg and Dev. Trust is so incredibly hard to give to someone when they are watching over someone so special to you!


So many people have asked Roger and I if this has been difficult to watch. If it reminds us of our experience last year. I have to answer that with both a yes and a no. Beau is progressing so fast! It's a relief to watch him breathe on his own. No gray spells, no ventilator, no translucent skin. But the stress we felt with our baby rivals the stress I feel for their baby. He may have three weeks on Brooklyn, but he's still 9 weeks early people! Plus, Meg and Dev are in a unique situation....they're not in their own home.


Megan and Devin are rock stars. They have been so strong. But they are dealing with unimagineable stress right now. My chest feels heavy when I think about everything they are trying to handle in their lives. Devin is in medical school, in a different state! They are having to pay two out of network yearly maximums! They're living out of suitcases right now! And most importantly their son is in an ICU. Yes our family has done this exact scenario a lot...but it doesn't get easier each time it happens. The burden just gets passed around.


But at the end of the day we can say with absolute certainty that this little boy is one loved baby! We cheer him on, celebrate each day that passes with no setbacks, and look forward to the day he can go home with his proud mom and dad.


To Beau - we sure do love you little man. Brooklyn is thrilled to have another cousin. We feel lucky to be able to watch your story happen. To watch how much your parents love you. There are angels watching over you...providing the world with another Christmas miracle this year. Counting down the days until you can come home!!

4 comments:

Team Beardshall said...

Glad he is doing well, thinking of you and your family :)

NatBug said...

This was a very sweet post. You are such a great sister, it is great that you are there for her like she was for you! Beau is just adorable!

anya said...

loved reading this post. i have been wondering how you and your hubby were doing with all this. i am so glad that Baby Beau is doing well. :)

Unknown said...

praying for your sweet family ashley!