Daddy's Girl

How do you put into words your feelings at this sight? This sweet daughter of ours knows her dad. She has always opened her eyes when we visit. But last night Roger was on the other side of her, requiring her to completely turn her head to be able to see him. Yet all it took was one word from her dad - one word - and she turned her head to him so fast he didn't even catch it. Her eyes were wide open. And she stared at him. Truly looked at him.

And I cried. Again.

Words can't express how my heart ached as I watched my husband and new dad walk away from his baby's crib as they suctioned his daughter's nose and mouth out. He couldn't watch, it made him feel bad. Roger has been my saving grace during this. Yet, I think he struggles in his own quiet way. He got choked up when he heard that our niece, Kaitlyn played a piano solo in church Sunday flawlessly...all because she was playing for Brooklyn. He cried with me last night as I cried because we were having to leave her behind. And because her cry is absolutely heartbreaking. She usually doesn't cry because she hurts, she's ticked she's being woken up. But any parent hates, hates, hates to see their child cry. They would do anything to take the hurt away. But this little girl has to carry her burden. We silently pray everyday that her guardian angels are shouldering part of her suffering.

Brooklyn is doing so well. Sometimes it feels like she has been ours for years, yet it will only be two weeks tonight that she has been on this earth. We are so grateful for her progress, she is truly beating the odds. Yet they say she'll be in the hospital until her original due date...that feels like an eternity away. So grateful we get to keep this girl forever!

Our families said we should be writing things down that she does each day that we want to remember. So for our sakes only (since neither of us keep journals), I'll add simple things at the end of each post. Feel free to skip these, they are only for our benefit years down the road...

• She loves to get her hair washed. Holds totally still and doesn't make a peep.
• She has the longest toes, fingers and feet - she curled her toes around Roger's finger last night.
• She opens her eyes each and every time we visit her. Sometimes its only a drunken one eye sort of look, but she definitely recognizes when we're there.
• She has the tiniest cry - just like a kitty cat. Makes me tear up every time she cries. Usually the cry involves a humongous, full body pouty lip before she lets loose. Such a stinkin cutie.
• When she does cry, its usually during diaper changes. But if Roger or I cover her body with our hands and talk to her, she stops crying.
• She gained 20 grams last night. When the nurse said this out loud, she instantly started crying. Typical girl already - cries when she sees the numbers on the scale! :)