Born Wednesday April 14th at 1:48am
Where do we start? I think a huge thank you should come first. Thank you to all of our family, friends, neighbors and many others for your gifts, visits, cards, flowers, phone calls, text messages and support! We are humbled. We are grateful. We are so very lucky to know each and every one of you. We are amazed by how thoughtful people can be. We have never felt so loved. A simple thank you doesn't do it justice, but its all we can say for now. So from the bottom of our broken hearts, we say THANK YOU!
The actual story should probably come next...
I worked Tuesday afternoon and had some mild pains at work. Initially I thought nothing of them. They didn't really hurt and didn't last long enough to make me think twice. I got home around nine and plopped on the couch. The pains were still there, so I started timing. For a whole hour. I finally told Roger that we may have a problem on our hands. My contractions were four minutes apart by this point. A quick phone call to both of our moms, followed by one to the hospital put us in the labor and delivery unit around 11:30pm. After the usual round of tests, the "down there" exam was done last. It was at this point that my darling nurse changed from calm - to panicked.
I was dilated to an 8! And I was only 28 weeks! Everything fell apart from there...though I must say the chaos was very smooth and quiet. We were immediately surrounded by a team of doctors, nurses, anesthesiologists, a pediatric team and more. Being a nurse, I knew what that scared look behind each of their eyes said. This was not good. This wasn't even termed worse. We were in crisis mode, this was a true emergency.
They wisked me away to a delivery room to prep me for transfer via life flight to IMC so the baby could be handed over to their NICU. But my OB wanted one last ultrasound before they rolled me out to the helicopter pad. With that decision came more trouble...the baby was breech. So they turned me right back around and literally ran me straight to the OR. If my water broke in route to the hopsital, it could kill us both. I was stripped down to nothing in preparation for an emergency c-section. Life Flight from Primary Childrens Hospital was called and on their way. We sat gowned, gloved, and sterile until we heard the helicopter hovering over the hopsital. Then they cut me open, took our precious baby girl out and handed her over to the pediatric resucitation team. At my request they showed Roger and I her face during the transfer from one doctor to the other.
Words don't express what it felt like to hear her cry. I lost it. Roger lost it. We were a total wreck. They intubated her right there in the OR and handed her over to the life flight team to stabilize her. Twenty minutes later they rolled our precious daughter into my delivery room to get one last look at her before they flew the seven minutes to PCMC. We took pictures and got to touch her tiny foot. They loaded her into the helicopter and she was gone.
So where is she now and how is she doing? She is in the NICU at Primary Childrens. She's a tiny little thing with no name yet. For now she's Baby Girl Gardner. We are hopeful yet cautious. We are devastated that our little one decided to join our family so early, but we are still proud parents! She may have the preemie look, but she's a cute little peewee to us.
We will post more pics and updates tomorow.
Again, thank you to our families that got out of bed and drove up to an hour to be there during the delivery. Going home from the hopsital at 4:00am isn't easy, so our thanks go to you first. To our own parents, thank you for your generosity and examples. What would we do without family?
To my Heavenly Father, thank you for entrusting us with one of your precious spirits. We love her more than we ever thought possible. We are humbled beyond words that she was sent to us, no matter how difficult her road may be.
To our baby girl, we love you and pray for you constantly. Keep up your fighting spirit. We are thrilled to have you in our family!
15 comments:
Hang in there Ash. I was so shocked when I came to work last night and heard about you. You are in my prayers and I am thinking about your sweet little girl a floor above. Take care of yourself too. I think after a c-section, you understand appy's so much better (and you will be able to empathize so much more with that first walk and getting out of bed). We are all thinking about you here on CSU. If you ever need a lunch buddy at the good ole Rainbow Cafe (or the Point!), I'm here! Congrats to you and also so sorry it has been a hard arrival.
I am so sorry, I can't even imagine how hard this has been but You guys are so strong! You are truly an example to us all. Seeing you yesterday I was amazed. You are all in my prayers! Let me know if there is anything I can do. Baby girl has some great parents and I know she is fighting to stay here with you guys. Congrats and you are right you have a whole family right here if you need anything at all.
Love
Natacia Lance
Ashlee, that is unbelievable! You guys are in our prayers!
You are a strong girl and it sounds like your little girl inherited that already. If you need anything I am a floor below and a neighborhood away! Congrats on your new baby. We are praying for all of you at our house.
Oh Ash, what a scary experience! I am praying hard for your beautiful baby girl, and I am just thankful that you are ok. Keep us all updated on that sweet babe!!
Your cute story made me cry. It is sad when little ones decide to come early, but hopefully she is a fighter! It sounds like she is doing well so far. I hope you and Roger are doing okay as well. If you need anything please let me know.
Ash, I haven't been able to get you guys off my mind since I heard. Just know I love ya and am praying that everything will work out the way it is supposed to. Congratulations on your little fighter!!
Ashlee - I am in tears as I am reading and writing this. I can't imagine what you are going through. You, Roger, and Baby Gardner have constantly been in my thoughts and prayers. The pictures you have of your sweet baby are so precious. She is beautiful. I know that it will all work out. You are such a strong and amazing person. I just love you so much and know that your new baby can feel of your love for her. We will continue to pray for you and your baby and hope the spirit of the Lord will pour down upon you. Hang in there, and congratulations on the precious new addition to your family.
I am so glad that you had a good medical team and that the doctor thought to do an ultrasound before you left. What a blessing. Also, what a blessing that you have such a supportive family. You seem to be in good hands. We are praying for you and baby.
My sister was born at 28 weeks-she was also two pounds and was a fighter! 33 years later she is healthy as can be.
Ashlee, that is so crazy. This is Jentre from work, I came across your blog on Kelly's, hope you don't mind. I am so sorry to hear about your little one, that is so scary. I just saw you on my last shift, and you were still so tiny! Those pictures are so sweet, they made me cry. Hope all is well, we will be praying for you! Good luck to both of you! Keep us updated on that sweet little girl!
By the way, our blog is private, so if you would like an invite, send me your e-mail. My e-mail is Jentreleishman@gmail.com. Probably the last thing on your mind right now, but maybe later after things calm down. Hope all is well.
Jentre
Ashlee....when I logged on today this was the last thing that I expected to see, seeing that are due dates were only 2 weeks apart. I wish that I knew how to comfort you right know, but it sounds like the two of your families are doing an awesome job.
I am so glad that you are ok and your baby girl is safe! She is so beautfiul, I am so proud of you for your strenghth. I know that she will be ok with you as her mommy and the great team at PCMC. If you need anything please let me know, I am only a couple of minutes away!
I will keep your baby girl, you and Roger in my prayers. Gosh I need to stop crying!!! Love, Nat
Wow. I can't imagine how hard it must be to go through what you're going through. I'm so glad you've both made it this far. I hope your sweet girl continues to improve and that you are recovering okay.
Wow. Your little girl is quite the fighter! I will keep you guys in our prayers. I hope that you are doing okay and that she is too.
I just cried read all this! I am sorry it didn't go at all how you have been planning. She is a tough cookie and so are you! (: I now you have family around, but if there is anything I can do please don't hesitate to call.
ashlee
i just read your blog in the middle of a night shift and cried. i have been in thailand on vacation. i'm so sorry that she came early but from all the other pictures she seems to be making milestones in the right direction. my thoughts and prayers are with you. i hope brooklyn is good today.
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